Sunday, 3 September 2017

Best of Times - Worst of Times

Just a short reflective post and I'm sorry if I ramble.
Following my divorce its enough to say that times were turbulant especially with my son who was 12 at the time and many years passed where his resentment, hurt etc all came to the fore. Enough to say that I often wondered if I could ever put things right.

18 months ago he asked if he could move in with us, he had been seeing a a girl from America and he wanted to emigrate and marry her, he was finding it hard to live at home with his mam. My wife despite reservations said he should live with us.

Despite some ups and downs we've put a lot of things right, father and son time has been spent doing all things we often talked about but never did - we haven't quite completed the list as whilst 18 months seems a long time it soon passes and Friday saw us have our last big wargame - a 30k Sci.fi game was his wish and it was most probably one of the most fun games we had but tinge with sadness that it was our last until whenever!

The weekend has been hard helping him pack and sort things out and identifying what else I need to post out.

Tomorrow will be harder as we go to Newcastle airport and he flies off to pastures new in Georgia.

It comes to all families I know and as we get older Life becomes a series of good byes and just reinforces that we shouldn't squander our time.

So my son will start his new life and with luck I will be out there next year for his wedding.

Missing him already ( think he's hoping for a part on Vikings series 6 :) )


19 comments:

  1. Not rambling, just saying how you feel. It's good to get it out there and not bottle it up. Tough times past and mended and a whole new relationship to look forward to with him and your daughter in law. The worlds a smaller place than it was. Make use of tech to stay in touch. It's not an end just a whole new start of things.
    Best wishes, Stu

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  2. Stuart
    thanks and you're absolutely right

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  3. Graham,
    Empty nest syndrome. Its never pleasant. Its more about gaining a daughter than losing a son.

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  4. They say Georgia is beautiful Graham so I think a visit or two a year may well be in order mate. Hope all goes well for that young man of yours.

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  5. Things move on. Look at it as another holiday destination with hobby off-shoots. These days of phones, computers, Skype and e-mail mean no-one is out of touch (unless they want to be).

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  6. Not a rambling post, but a great post Graham. It's sad the young chap is off to pastures new, but awsome that you got the oppertunity to clear the air and spend some great time together before he left the UK.

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  7. Not a rambling post, but a great post Graham. It's sad the young chap is off to pastures new, but awsome that you got the oppertunity to clear the air and spend some great time together before he left the UK.

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  8. at least he's going somewhere warm and quite pleasant, and not Darlington like my daughter!😂😂😂

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  9. Gents,
    Thanks for the comments much appreciated and all correct in what you say. As in all things in life we move forward and make the most of opportunities and he has left me a pile of figures to make and paint for him 😀

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  10. Great post Graham. I am learning to look for the joy in them growing into young adults that I am proud of and glad they are making their own way. Still hurts I know.

    Richard

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    1. Richard,
      Enjoy it all passes so quick.

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  11. Graham... that's a very lovely post.
    A wise man once told me that all we can do for our children is give them "the roots to grow, and the wings to fly."
    You have given him very fine roots indeed, and the courage and confidence to pursue his life in the direction he wishes to go... and for what better reason than for love. Well done on a very moving post... more so because I can remember him so very young! With heartfelt best wishes for both your futures.
    Phil

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    1. Phil,
      As usual your philosophy comes to the fore and thankyou. Yes those early days were fun and the boy has come a long way and again thank you for your words.

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  12. Get him interested in the Atlanta Falcons and the Braves - two holidays a year!

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    1. Paul,
      Absolutely and the new Falcons stadium looks awesome

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  13. Very heartwarming story, thanks for sharing. As someone who left it too late to get to know his father, you absolutely both done good!

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    1. Barry,
      Thanks for those words I have learnt not to leave things unsaid.

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  14. Beautiful written post and very heartfelt. Good luck to your son and his new life in Georgia. Your post is very inspiring to me to be ready when my son and daughter someday leave the area.

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  15. Just catching up as I've been away. The best thing is you have spent time together having good times and giving him a basis in a wonderful hobby which will probably never leave him. As another commenter has said, these days you need not feel far apart, and although my son is only in London it might as well be America since he is so busy there is little time for communication. But I see him a couple of times a year and you have the chance of holidays somewhere more exotic, and the occasional game when he comes back home. Meanwhile you have an absorbing hobby and work to distract you. Best wishes Chris

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